An Indian by heart, tongue and soul

Recently, I stumbled upon an interesting writing challenge in The Hindu, which I shall paraphrase it here. 

Choose any item that we come across in our daily lives, say the tooth brush or the comb, and then research and write a small article on it covering some points such as: When did it come into existence, how does it work, what is its purpose, et cetera.

Stuck in this never ending rat race of a life, we never bother to pause for a moment and wonder about certain recurring events that take place around us. We simply take them for granted. 

Take nail trimming, for instance. We do it so often but very few of us, if not none, might have given a thought to the history of a nail clipper. I mean, how did people cut nails before its invention? Did they just bite their finger nails or rip them off? Then, what about their toe nails? The possibility of the usage of sharp stones or rugged tools, or even the mouth, if I may dare to say, brings forth a couple of scary images to my mind. Imagination, at times, can be a curse.

So anyway, I wanted to write on something more absorbing than a nail clipper. I pondered upon what we would come across more often in our lives. What would perhaps at least slightly intrigue us or make us question the very existence of it?

Last night, after scratching out four hundred words written on three sheets of paper and pulling out two dozen strands of hair from my head, I had my moment of epiphany.  

I had finally chosen my item.

Arnab Goswami was born on January 24, 1969 in Guwahati, Assam. He comes from a family of eminent jurists. His paternal grandfather was a well known lawyer, a Congress leader and a freedom fighter. His maternal grandfather was a leader of the opposition in Assam for many years. His father was an army officer. Arnab is currently an Indian journalist who is the Editor in Chief and News anchor of the Indian news channel Times Now. (Source – Wikipedia)

Now, for all those of you who think that Arnab is an obnoxious, loud-mouthed narcissist who thrusts his opinion down your throat by continuously interrupting you while you are talking, with his booming voice that keeps rising to undefined heights, and instead should be more of a polite moderator with a neutral perspective on any topic and treat you with respect during all the conversations or debates that take place on national television, I say, bleh. Haters gonna hate. You are clearly not looking at the hidden picture. 

Behind all those loud spoken words, can you not see the true Indian soul dying to burst out from within?

Can you not feel the quiet fury seething inside him against all the atrocities committed across our nation?

Don't you think that the guy who has graduated in Sociology and has a Master’s degree from Oxford University in Social Anthropology, which by the way studies how contemporary human beings behave in social groups, would know better on how to handle group discussions?

I, for one, truly believe that Arnab is an Indian by heart tongue and soul. I have had many dreams wherein I get interviewed by him and I'll take this opportunity to share one of them with you.

Arnab: Mr. cmus , first of all, it’s a pleasure to have you on Times Now tonight.

cmus : Thank you so much.

Arnab: Mr. cmus, you are here with us at a time when our nation is facing several challenges – immigration, corruption, tax evasion, molestation, inflation. But tonight I want to take up some of the main points specifically related to the Jan Lokpal Bill. In light of the large number of scandals and money laundering in India, do you think that the Jan Lokpal Bill would completely eradicate corruption if it is successfully implemented?

cmus : Arnab, I don’t think that the Jan Lokpal Bill...

Arnab: SO MR.CMUS, YOU THINK THAT THE JAN LOKPAL BILL IS SIMPLY ANOTHER ONE OF THOSE NAMESAKE GRIEVANCE REDRESSAL MECHANISMS? 

cmus : No, I mean it might not completely eradicate...

Arnab: THE ENTIRE NATION, MR. CMUS, THE ENTIRE NATION IS OUTRAGED BY THE MUSHROOMING SCAMS AND FOR ONCE WE ARE UNITED TO FIGHT AGAINST A HEINOUS CRIME AND HERE YOU ARE SAYING THAT PROMINENT SOCIAL ACTIVISTS LIKE ANNA HAZARE AND ARVIND KEJRIWAL ARE ACTUALLY WASTING THEIR TIME? 

cmus : I did not say that, Arnab. What I meant was...

Arnab: PLEASE, MR.CMUS, PLEASE DO NOT INSULT OUR VIEWERS’ INTELLIGENCE. I have a document here with me in my hand which has the transcript of this interview from the past couple of minutes. I would like to draw your attention to these words circled in red; THESE FOUR WORDS SPECIFICALLY, Mr.cmus, which read ‘I don’t think that’. That was your response to my question whether the Jan Lokpal Bill would eradicate corruption if it is passed by our government. Kindly explain your statement.

cmus : I will. Thank you. If you could just let me complete...

Arnab: Of course. Please take your time and enlighten us.

cmus : I meant to say that the Jan Lokpal Bill alone might not...

Arnab: SO YOU WANT ANOTHER BILL TO SUPPORT THE JAN LOKPAL BILL? IS THAT YOUR POINT, MR.CMUS? WHO WILL REGULATE THE REGULATORS? WHAT IF THE FENCES START EATING THE CROPS? HOW CAN WE TRUST THE...

cmus : No Arnab, hold on. That’s not...

Arnab: Allow me to complete my question, Mr.cmus. Please. You are not letting me speak here. My question is very simple. My question is, Mr. cmus, and this is an important one; my question to you is...DO YOU WANT ANOTHER BILL TO BE DRAFTED ALONGWITH THE JAN LOKPAL BILL AND WHAT POINTS WOULD YOU LIKE TO COVER IN THE SECOND BILL? IS THE JAN LOKPAL BILL MISSING SOME CRUCIAL DETAILS?

cmus : You are actually taking it in the wrong sense...

Arnab: We have a limited time frame here, Mr.cmus and our viewers are waiting for your honest opinion on this show tonight, SO PLEASE DO NOT TWIST THE WORDS. TRY TO CONVEY YOUR THOUGHTS IN THE “CORRECT” SENSE. All I’m asking you is WHETHER ANNA HAZARE’S ON-AND-OFF FAST WOULD TURN OUT TO BE INCONSEQUENTIAL.

cmus : Okay, let me answer your previous query first... 

Arnab: THAT WAS VERY SMOOTHLY HANDLED. YOU ARE TRYING TO AVOID MY QUESTION, MR.CMUS. MY QUESTION IS...(The video goes blank.)

We are sorry for the unexpected interruption, ladies and gentlemen. There seems to be a technical glitch in the video transmission. We’ll be right back with the Newshour debate in a short while. JAN LOKPAL BILL – AN EFFECTIVE ANTI CORRUPTION TOOL OR JUST A CASE OF “ANOTHER ONE BITES THE DUST”? Stay tuned.

Of course, this is just wishful thinking and might never happen for real. But, you cannot ask a man not to have high aspirations.

And at those times when a dozen individuals from various domains are called for a rational and matured discussion, all you have to do for a better awareness is grasp a few words as and when you can amidst all the cacophony of hoots and wails, and string them together to make a sensible statement. Come on, it's not that hard now, is it?

Moreover, if Arnab was not Arnab, would you have watched the news in the first place?

 Note:

1. For reasons unknown, I don't like "cmus" to be written with a "C". Unless of course, all four letters are in caps.

2. You might want to check out this blog in your free time. Mediacrooks.